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Obama Loses Nobel Prize in Soda Machine

President Obama found himself planning a return trip to Norway after accidentally losing his Nobel Peace Prize in one of the White House soda machines.

“I think, well, I know for sure,” said Obama, “That this is something all of us have done at least once. I had a craving. That craving was for a Fanta Grape. Before I knew it, the soda was in my hand and my Nobel Prize had disappeared into the coin slot.”

According to White House spokesman Robert Gibbs, the President immediately summoned Vice President Biden to try putting dollar bills into the machine in hopes that the Nobel Prize would come out as change.

“Vice, uh, President Biden, uh, put about 23, uh, dollars into the, uh, soda machine,” said, uh, Gibbs, “The Nobel, uh, Prize never came out, and the, uh, machine ran out of, uh, Mug Root Beers, uh, and that’s the, uh, only soda that Joe, uh, likes.”

According to Gibbs, Biden was unavailable for comment because he was busy drinking 21 Mug Root Beers.

Obama gave up on retrieving the coin-shaped prize the next morning as the vending machine company came and emptied the machine while he was searching for Rahm Emanuel, the only person in the White House who likes Diet Pepsi.

The President briefly chased the vending machine company’s van on foot, but soon gave up, slumped his head, and moped back to the White House to book a trip to Norway.

The President seemed confident that there would be another Nobel Prize waiting for him in Norway because “They probably keep those things in rolls like quarters.” If he’s not successful in Norway, Obama sounded reasonably sure that he can find a suitable replacement if he attends enough garage sales.

“I’ve been told someone bought Arafat’s peace prize for eight bucks,” said the President.

According to White House spokesman Robert Gibbs, Vice President Biden was unable to accompany the President on his second trip because he was too busy urinating.

The fate of the President’s lost Nobel Prize remains a mystery, as the vending machine company is unwilling to discuss what happens to the change they collect.

“No refunds,” said a company representative who refused to identify himself.

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